In the Details

Have you ever had one of those moments that you just want to pause and live in forever? I know I am blessed because I have so many of those daily. Here is how they always go:  Rivers walks to the record player and just looks at me and smiles. I press start on his Vampire Weekend album and he  runs to me and hugs me so hard around the neck and won't let go. I pick him up and we dance like crazy fools in front of our big open living room window for all the world to see. He wants me to hold him the entire time the record is playing. It's our little pre-nap ritual. It's hard to type out exactly what I'm feeling as his little arms are wrapped so tight behind my neck. He buries his face into my right shoulder and I know he is beaming.  Sometimes I get a kiss on the neck. Sometimes he will just start laughing uncontrollably. Sometimes he just stays quiet and I sing to him. Always he is holding me with his arm so wrapped around me. These are the kinds of moments, when the music is so sweet, and the love is so present, that I just want to remember every single detail so I can never forget any of it. I do everything I can to take a mental snapshot and just keep the moment alive in my mind. The bits of oatmeal on his face, the one bare foot. To me, this is what life is all about. Maybe one day, 40 years from now, Rivers will be driving home from a hard day of work. Maybe he will flip through the radio and hear "I Think UR a Contra" on the oldies station. Maybe he will remember dancing with his momma around the coffee table as the sun came pouring in all around us through the big open window. Maybe he will smile, and his hard day will be turned completely around. I know he will remember the love we both felt as we hugged each other and swayed to the music.